2024-04-30

Punctuated

 

One person seen from the knees up has their body turned away from the other but face towards the other. The other is closer to the reader, from the waist up, arms folded. Both people look hesitant, uncertain. Above and between them, various punctuation with no words hovers in the air. Caption at bottom: Intermittent punctuation undermined the silence.

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2024-04-29

Restlessness

 

A person lies on their back on the floor with arms folded and legs writhing in the air. The legs are disproportionately long and twisted. The person says, "Restless legs, why can't you be lethargic like the rest of the body?"

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2024-04-28

Write what you know

 

A sad person sits on a tall stool and slumps over an acoustic guitar. "No one understands me. / Maybe my lyrics are too vague. / Maybe I should write them in human language."

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2024-04-27

Possibilities, probably

 

This one is all one panel but with an implied three-panel structure, all with the same half-sketched contemplative character thinking, in sequence, "I could do whatever I want, probably." and "No one would stop me, I bet." and "They probably should, though."

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2024-04-26

Condiments and comprehensibility

 

Person 1, smiling and gesticulating: "[Conversing conversationally]". Person 2, with small, faraway eyes: "Sorry, I'm too hungry to see you as anything but a giant talking sandwich, and I can't understand you through all the mustard."

But let me be clear: I am not complaining about the amount of mustard. Even more would be good too. You could totally pull it off.

 

Discussion: I should have drawn the person as the talking sandwich, maybe? Despite the fact that we are observing this scene from outside the second character's perspective? And more importantly despite the fact that I didn't want to?

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2024-04-25

The hat hungers

 

Pictured: a person wears a hat something like a tophat but less rigid. Also, it has wild eyes and long, sharp teeth. The person says, "It's not my style at all, but I inexplicably must have it!" The caption at the bottom: Juniper Sulfurson has just unwittingly begun a symbiotic relationship with a formidable hat.

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2024-04-24

Do it right

 

A cloud with a face says, "The thing you did was bad, but I don't care about that part. Just do it right is what I'm saying."
Starting to think this cloud needs professional help. (This is nothing but my brain is broken and insists on posting sunk costs instead of a rerun.)

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2024-04-23

Ward against

 

A person holds an upside-down coffee mug (printed with "Mondays, am I right?") and shakes the last drips of coffee out, having leapt and landed on one knee, with a fierce glare. Caption: The ritual was said to ward against small talk.

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2024-04-22

New captain, not the same as the old captain

 

Text: "Captain Birdbeard". Pictured: a person with a tuft of hair atop their head and a long, black-and-grey beard in which at least four little yellow birds are nestled.

This isn't really a comic, but who actually cares? I can only get in trouble with myself & I don't really respect that guy's opinion anyway.

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2024-04-21

sproing

 

A snake, coiled into a spring shape, springs through the air behind a weary stick figure. The snake says, "Snake surprise!" The person says, "It's not a surprise if you do it a dozen times a day."

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2024-04-20

The joke is cat

 

This comic is technically in three panels, but I did a weird thing in the first two where a three-step action takes place across them and cuts the border between the two panels where the middle action takes place. A person walks, then falls abruptly backwards, then picks themself up off the ground and says, "Good thing no one saw that!" In the third panel, a cat narrows its eyes and says, "I did, but I ain't sayin' nothin' to nobody."

Here is the promised cat comic. May I have some mainstream success now, please?

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2024-04-19

Wasn't going to until

A stick figure with bull-like horns on their head looks annoyed and says, "Well, I wasn't going to gore you until you brought it up."

Struggling today, so here's this scribble from my notebook from a couple weeks ago when I was struggling less. The illegible text says, "Well, I wasn't going to gore you until you brought it up." It's funny because it's relatable! Tune in next time for one where the entire joke is that there's a cat!

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2024-04-18

Don't delay! Act today!

 

In the style of a law firm class action advertisement, a generic person stands with hands on hips, looking just past the viewer, accompanied by the following words: "Were you told you could do or be anything if you believed in yourself and/or put your mind to it? / YOU MAY BE ENTITLED TO COMPENSATION! / Reach out today for a FREE consultation!"

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2024-04-17

Thinkin' 'bout

 

A person is thinking hard. Their thought bubble contains no words, only an image of a desert with a standing hoodoo, a toppled hoodoo, and a couple tumbleweeds.

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2024-04-16

Terminal proximity

 

A glum stick figure holds a large sign: "THE END IS NOT SO NEAR AS I HAD PREVIOUSLY SUPPOSED"

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2024-04-15

No thank you

 

A person has begun to walk across a bridge, but a giant troll stands in the way in the middle and says, not unpleasantly, "To cross this bridge, you must first tell me something you love about yourself." The person glares with folded arms and steps onto the sidewall of the bridge, saying, "Fine, I'll just walk into the river." In the rough water below, a smiling crocodilian looks up at the exchange.

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2024-04-14

In which there is Geribald

Panel 1 of 2: A person bursts through a door into a nondescript room where two people are chatting. One of the latter holds a mug. The former shouts, "Geribald sighting! This is not a drill!" Panel 2 of 2: Three figures seen from behind look out a wide window, where they see Geribald walking happily down the sidewalk. Geribald is a vaguely tyrannosaurid dinosaur in stick figure style, and also has a broad mustache. The people looking out the window say, "ooh" and "Looking well!" and "I love it when there is Geribald."

(First seen here.)

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2024-04-13

Surprised

 

Person 1 asks Person 2, who has an exclamation mark hovering above their head, "You surprised about something?" Person 2 says, "Hours ago. Mildly. Now I can't get the dang thing to go away."

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2024-04-12

If when then

 

A person sits on the floor leaning against the front of a couch, a placidly blank expression on their face as they stare forward. "I think I will know what I am finding when I look for it."

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2024-04-11

Sorry your name is

 

A person holds a piece of paper or perhaps an envelope and reads from it. They're standing about two meters from another person. The first says, "I'm sorry...your name is 'Pleurp'?" The second smiles slightly and says, "You don't have to be sorry. You didn't name me that."

It is fun to say, though. I'm going to be your friend so I get to say it all the time, OK?

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2024-04-10

The lumberjack code

A person with an axe asks a tree, "Are you a talking tree? I don't cut down talking trees." The tree replies in song, "I'm a singing tree! And I only sing showtunes!"
 

Thank you for your honesty.

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2024-04-09

Concerning

Person looking into mirror says, "Gotta think of something funny... Hating myself is funny, right?" The reflection says, "Actually it's really concerning—" The person cuts off the reflection with "Haha, yeah. Concerning is funny."
Thanks, mirror. Good talk.

 

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2024-04-08

Instincts

 

A moth flits around a glowing yellow lightbulb in a dark place. A human says, "Hey. Moth. Your instincts are wrong." The moth yells, "You people *made* my instincts wrong".

Well, yeah, but we also made our own instincts wrong, so.

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2024-04-07

Winged life

 

A stick figure with large, feathery wings emerging from the shoulders and arms hanging dejectedly down. "Birds still don't want to hang out with me."

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2024-04-06

Awfully nebulous

 

A standing person raises hands at their sides and calls out across an empty land, "What is this vague feeling?" A looming cloud says, "It's vagueness. Happy to help."

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2024-04-05

Here

 

Top caption: You know how sometimes in horror movies, someone looks around and says "We shouldn't be here"? A stick figure standing on a lumpy but featureless plane looks anxious and has a speech bubble leading up to the "We shouldn't be here". Bottom caption: That's how I feel anywhere, all the time. END

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2024-04-04

Mistakes

 

A smiling person leans way back on the hind legs of a chair, arms folded behind head, and says, "Make one mistake and it could really cost you. Screw up in bulk and you tap into economy of scale."

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2024-04-03

Hatless

 

Panel 1 of 3: Orlo Cube removes the top hat. Under it, a smaller bowler hat remains on his head. Panel 2 of 3: Orlo removes the second, inner hat, under which is a bright yellow bird. Panel 3 of 3: We see Orlo from the eyes up, head raised for the first time in a long time, the bird still perched atop his head as he looks up over the grey blocky buildings of the studio lot and into a slightly green-blue sky with fluffy clouds.

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2024-04-02

Shut it down

 

Orlo Cube sits dejected on a curb somewhere on the studio lot, still wearing the top hat. A worker pushes a cart bearing the grave stone of Persephone Waits (as seen in 2024-03-31's comic) and says to Orlo, "Wardrobe's looking for you. They need two hats back."

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2024-04-01

Midseason cancelation

 

Today's comic is divided into three 'pages' with four panels total. Panel 1 of 4: Orlo Cube, wearing the top hat, bursts into the office of some kind of studio bigwig and says, "You can't cancel Dramatis Personae!" The executive, sitting at their desk, says, "Can and must! It was going nowhere! Just character after quirky character, with the static shots and that weird voice narrating..." Panel 2 of 4: The angle has changed; the reader is now looking over Orlo's shoulder at the executive, still seated at the desk. Now the angle permits a view of a sparsely populated desk, with only a smartphone face down and a stack of folders full of documents. The exec continues: "People can tolerate an auteur, John, but there are limits." Orlo says, "My name is Orlo. Orlo Cube." The exec replies, "Very method. But you gotta let it go. Figure out what's next." Panel 3 of 4: a closeup on Orlo from the chest up, head leaning down so as to obscure Orlo's eyes, hands raised at the sides of face, gestculating. "But we never found out the Secret of the Inner Hat!" Panel 4 of 4: Now Orlo's head droops, eyes still obscured the hat's brim. "*I* never found out."

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